Preacher Man slithers to town.
Gonna solve problems that
we never had – before.
Gonna tell us ‘bout sins that
we never did – before.

He’s packin’ the pews and
we’re payin’ big dues
to hear his raunchy sermons.
Descriptions so good and scenes so hot
he leaves us dying to try it.
He grins real big at sumptuous sin
but tells us not to taste it.
Oh, but the fruit so juicy and smells so sweet –
seems a greater sin to waste it.

Now, if we’re real strong and
eschew his enticements –
Preacher Man has more ways to
mess up our days.  Piously and insidiously,
he degrades our life-long habits.
Pleasurable things – which have caused no harm –
now, have sinful labels.
And you better listen close to what he has to say.
For, now, he claims – there’s gonna be hell to pay.

Hell to pay you say? Sure,
if you can make up the sin,
you can make up the punishment.
Preacher Man gets you in and only
Preacher Man can get you out.
No other way will do!
Got you comin’ and got you goin’ – with
payments required each way.
And that’s at the bottom of what Preacher Man has to say.